Buying A New Car




The Cougar is wasted. I’ve been feeling bad about it pretty much since the deer wreck. It’s front end is thrashed, the paint is completely shot. Under the hood sits a tired 302 leaking oil from everywhere. That motor was rebuilt by Dad and myself when I was still in high school. Back in 1987 I think it was. On the inside, the headliner is ripped to shreds. Safety pins hold it up in enough places so I can see out the rear window. There’s a giant crack in the dashboard that’s split it in two. Both front bucket seats need reupholstering badly. The driver’s side is so destroyed that I stuffed an old shirt into it to keep my backside from hitting the floorboard below. There used to be a vinyl top on the roof but it disintegrated. I hacked the rest of it off the car with a dull carpet cutter which revealed a whole heap of red rust.

Basically, my car is a genuine cop magnet. No matter where I am driving that thing around as soon as a patrolman spots it they’re anticipating a juicy bust with plenty of ticket writing. I keep my shit in order though and I don’t bury my foot in the pedal doing stupid stuff. The cops always leave disappointed when everything checks out okay. Sometimes I get the feeling they’d like to bust a taillight so they can at least give me a fix it ticket, but the lights back there are armored. So are the headlights for that matter.

Seventeen years is a long time to have the same car. I’d really like to restore the Cougar, but to do that properly I can’t be using it as my daily driver. I need something else. Something brand new for a change. All I know is old classic cars from the Sixties. The Cougar is as recent as I get. 1968. Maybe it’s time I buy a brand new ride and park this mangy beast so I can fix it up. Could be a fun project and I won’t have to worry about getting to work every day. While I’m at it I should finally do something with that Oldsmobile too. Autumn has been bugging me to get it running again. She’s a hotrodder at heart with a secret lust for big old cars and their big back seats. Rebuilding that engine is going to be a serious chore though. Not sure I’m up for that.

Ford has extended their employee discount to our company because we exclusively buy their vehicles for our nationwide fleet. Not too many of our people know about that benefit. Through Ford I can instantly knock thousands of dollars off a car’s asking price and there’s no worry of negotiating with salespeople at a dealership. Ford Corporate handles the whole thing. I’m supposed to go in and just pick out a car and that’s that. No haggling or bullshit. I think I’m going to check it out. Might as well see what the Japanese have to offer while I’m at it although I don’t expect to fit inside any of their cars. I’m just too damned tall and those cars are made for little people anyway. Won’t hurt to look though.


~ by factorypeasant on July 28, 2006.

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