Computer Termite

We’ve been having a ton of computer problems in the area. It’s becoming a serious nuisance. Doing a little sleuthing I discovered a technician named Mike has been meddling around with our PC software settings. This guy has a superiority complex like I have never encountered before. Real obnoxious. Apparently, in his little world he knows everything there is to know about a PC and mere mortals such as myself aren’t intelligent enough to figure it all out. Well, what I do know is this. Every time he puts his greasy mitts on one of our workstations, the thing goes belly-up and it’s unuseable until someone from site IT comes out and unfucks the machine for us. I’ve started referring to Mike as the Computer Termite since he gets inside them like those pesky bugs get into a piece of wood and rip it to shreds.

Computer Termite is a closet deviant of some sort. I’m convinced. He is pudgy, wears rimmed glasses, and his hair is cut in a page-boy style. It’s goofy lookin’. Since we got back from Spokane the Computer Termite has become extremely tight with It. That right there raises my eyebrows plenty. I see It and Computer Termite spending quality time together. Makes me wonder if maybe they’re an item. Just the thought of it makes me cringe. I can see it now, pudgy page boy holding hands and walking down the street on a sunny day with the post-op transvestite that looks like a dirty hippy. Ugh.

If these computer problems keep coming up thanks to the Termite I’m gonna have to complain to Squirmy. The bossman will have to sit the Computer Termite down and get him under control. Squirmy usually tries to duck dealing with people on the line, but if we continue losing production time just because a super nerd tinkers with our systems his hand will be forced. He will do something about it.

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~ by factorypeasant on June 26, 2005.

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