California Trainees

On this transfer project there are three main product groups that will be leaving the Spokane factory for good. The products I’m working on came out of Bill and Dave’s R&D Labs in the 1970s and are still a very capable instrument. Aerospace and Defense sectors love it for it’s incredibly low phase noise specifications, and newer follow on products can’t match some of it’s performance features. In comparison to the other two product groups we are medium sized as far as employees go. The biggest one has about 30 California trainees and the small group has just a few people. Overall I guess there’s about 50 or 60 California folks up here and at least an equal amount of SKD people training them. I don’t get to talk to the people in the other two groups much so I don’t know what they are working on or anything about them really. I’m isolated in my own little product world here.

The California employees I’ve had to deal with day in and day out seem to me to be real losers. Instead of keeping their mouths shut and pay attention to our work, they spend most of the time wandering around or just yapping all day. I get the feeling some of them are trying to prove to the Spokane people how cool and stylish they are. It’s backfiring in a big way. Sharon has told me there is growing anger among the Spokane people, not just because they know they are losing their jobs to us, but because they were told by management they were going to get “highly skilled” people to train. So far they realize most of the California people sent here are total fools. Some are almost untrainable. Because I have been working for the past two years in a military environment on classified defense products and smart weapon systems I am coming back to this company with a very strict work ethic. I keep my mouth shut and my hands busy. You can’t do anything other than that or you find yourself fired immediately when you’re working for the military. Here things seem to be out of control and if these people were working at TDS they probably wouldn’t have survived their first week employed there. Most if not all of them would have been thrown out. That’s the real world.

My no frills work habits have put a bunch of my fellow Californians off. Sharon tells me they think I have a superiority complex. In reality all I’m trying to do is learn this product. That’s what I’m here for, after all. They aren’t paying me to fuck around and bullshit all day.

Slobbering Mouth Kid is one of the most dangerous employees to talk with here. He’s a gossip that spends his entire shift ranting about other people’s private business who are working on the transfer. I don’t dare tell this jerkoff anything about myself because I know it will instantly be all over the fucking factory shop floor. I try to deflect his personal questions and change the subject as much as possible. I suppose this has contributed to my “superiority complex”. Slobbering Mouth Kid is overweight, short, and very young. He’s extremely stupid. Each night after work he goes out to bars with some of the other employees and gets completely hammered. Most days he comes in to work severely hung over. His head is shaved and he likes to put a pencil behind one ear. His job requires him to do alot of soldering and while he is mindlessly yapping away he scratches the side of his noggin with the pencil stashed behind his dopey looking ear. Sometimes he forgets that he put the pencil down on his workbench. Still yapping away about nothing I want to hear from his lips, he will scratch the side of his head while he’s holding a 750 degree flat tipped soldering iron and burn the shit out of his skull. It’s kinda funny.

Toothless is a black girl that is an item with Golden Boy. She likes to wear skin tight minidresses and push up bras. Sometimes I can’t help but stare at her bootay when she isn’t looking. She doesn’t seem very experienced in electronics or too bright, but she is nice enough to talk to. Sometimes when she’s with the other ladies I get a feeling she’s talking shit about people here and being somewhat of a backstabber, but I can’t prove it. It’s just a hunch from the way she carries herself. She is actually missing a few teeth, hence the nickname.

Speaking of weirdness, let me tell you about the Troll. This woman is about as short as she is wide. She is going bald and has legs the size of large tree trunks. Her uniform of choice is frequently loose fitting shorts and white tennis shoes. Her shirts generally are pastel colored. Her face reminds me of an old worn out bulldog. Troll has been fake nice to me since I got here and she seems angry or annoyed somehow because I’m here. I haven’t been able to figure out why but something is definetly going on that’s not good. Troll has a really bad personality and I don’t like her. Hope I can figure out what it is that’s bugging her whenever I’m around.

Golden Boy is a kiss ass (K.A.) supreme. I don’t know what his job functions are. I never see him doing anything though except run his mouth. He wanders in and out of production areas wearing power t-shirts and skin tight short shorts. A couple of times I think he has come into the plant wearing Toothless’ clothes, like her coats and maybe a shirt or two. It’s kinda funky. His nose looks like it’s been broken a couple of times in fights. I call it the boxer nose look. There’s a small patch of his black hair he has bleached golden blonde, so I call him Golden Boy because he’s the project manager’s kiss ass and because of his stupid hairdo. The guy annoys the shit out of me every time he’s around.

The Squirrel and The Fisherman I don’t know very well yet. Squirrel is just that- squirrelly. She’s goofy and dingbat weird all the time every day. Another one of Malta’s products, she talks funny and can’t spell just like every person from Malta that I’ve met in my lifetime. She has beady eyes and acts shifty around me. The Fisherman is a nice enough guy. He’s older and has white hair. Seems like he has a good sense of humor and he likes to spend alot of time in the great outdoors fly fishing and hiking around.

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~ by factorypeasant on January 7, 2005.

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